Week 4 is over, and hopefully the reign of terror of Jeff Tripplette will be soon with the NFL's new bench ref squad. That guy has been awful for years, and he did his best to cost the pack a win. Thank god for properly icing a kicker with multiple penalties. And can we have an "accident" happen to Graham Harrell? Something to the effect of, "I don't know what happened officer. He tripped and all of a sudden his head fell off." Let's get on that.
Also, the Lions lost to Christian Ponder. Russ Wilson had 3 "touchdowns" as the Seahawks fell to the Rams. And Peyton Manning looked like he got all the tapenade against the rival Raiders. Week four is just about over, so lets see how all the NFL action related to your team of chosen players:
Thanks for Nothing Jerk team of the week. Reminder, these are the lowest scoring starters on any squad. Ooooh do I have some hate to dish out on one of these...
QB- Phillip Rivers 18- Usually we're in the single digits with this position, but everyone did a great job of choosing QBs.
RB- CJ Spiller 3
RB- Darren McFadden 3
WR- Stevie Johnson 4
WR- Malcom Floyd, Julio Jones 4- I have a running gentleman's bet going right now as to who will end up the better receiver this year, Roddy White or Julio Jones. So far it's 2-2 in weeks, but roddy has a huge points advantage 80-57. This is because Roddy White is awesome and Julio Jones is merely good.
TE- Dennis Pitta 0- OH AM I PISSED AT YOU PITTA. I see you come in 2nd in the league in TE targets, leading your team, and you don't get a single catch?!? WTF DUDE?!? I hope you get donkey punched by an actual donkey.
K- Rod Bironas 2- another one of my guys
D- Jets -0.5 The Jets are tied for first in their division and yet are considered a mess. Way to go Narratives. I understand the "What did you bring in Tebow for if you aren't going to use him when Sanchez struggles?" argument. I also understand that Tebow can't throw the ball and will lead to losses. But let's look at how this will play out:
The Jets keep Sanchez in for one more game, against the Texans, the best team in the AFC. They get blown out. Tebow starts the next week against Indy and wins. Then they start him again and they lose to the pats at NE. This is explained away as the Pats are a good team. Then they beat the Dolphins and Tebow has a 2-1 record as opposed to 2-3 for Sanchez. After the bye, they lose to Seattle and blame it on travel. They win again the following week against a bad Rams team and tebow is said to be coming around. That is dashed as New England beats them in the Meadowlands. But then Tebow rips off 5 wins in a row to guide the team into the playoffs against a cross country traveling cardinals, and 4 bad teams in Jacksonville, Tennessee, a cross country traveling San Diego, and clinch a playoff spot at Buffalo. Tebow is considered a savior and is praised beyond belief.
Remember, you read it here first. This is exactly how it will play out.
Now the team of Bench Players that would've been competitive with your team:
QB- Josh Freeman 15- The choices of people on the bench no one started were Freeman, Bradford with 6, and Russ Wilson with 1
RB- CJ2Fat 20- HAHAHAHA, he broke out
RB- Fred Jackson 8- Alfred morris was started by 1 team and got 21. Jackson wasn't started at all.
WR- Brian Hartline 49
WR- Anquan Boldin 25
WR- James Jones 22
TE- Fred Davis 11
Game Review:
BCB 1-
Fiesta's Stomp had his best week yet led by Matty Ice, Victor Cruz, Willis McGahee, and the Texas D to lead him over brewCrewBrian's Lil Giants despite Roddy White's best effort to date.
Icecreamman came through on his guarantee last week and beat Leam's squad. Brees, Ridley and Torrey Smith led the way, as Leam was paced by RG3 and Dez, but had little else.
JEO came oh so close to getting off the schneid but could not pull through as he lost by .5 points to Cheezconqueso. JEO had Arodg and Mike Turner but little else, and Cheez had just enough from Charles, Shady, Gronk and the Red Rifle.
My Sanchez's Lil Black Yearbook ran away with the win last night as the Bears D, Brady, Bowe, and Jordy led the way over Tepo's Labor Camp. Tepo had 5 guys in single digits, and that will spoil Cam and Brandon Marshall's big days.
Masondlo made Olyknows the likely choice for hardluck loser as he had very good to spectacular efforts up and down his team beating Oly 173-156.5. Oly had 3 guys at 11 points or under, and it doomed him.
BCB 2-
Arfuture had 5 guys in the single digits, including nothing from the overrated Bills D, and it led to a blowout by Golfallday, who got 20+ from Peyton, Vjax, and Decker.
Doubleb was in a similar position by not benching Nicks even though it was known on Saturday that he'd be out (this is why you need to follow me on Twitter) and having Martellus Bennett score just 1. Imagine Jermichael Finley without the perceived potential, and that is Martellus Bennett. Anyway, Texwestern crushed him with bigger days from Welker, Dez, and RG3.
Obibraunkenobi clocked his first win in a big way with 4 patriots scoring at least 14 points for him including Brady's 40 (he also had Ridley, Lloyd and Gronk), while jerryheldred couldn't keep pace despite Andy Dalton, AJ Green and a return to draft position form from CJ2Fat.
I had my heart broken as Man Sploosh fell by a half a point to kfeyzi's ochocinco's casting tape. Hey look at that, if I didn't start ANY defense, I would've tied. The Jets had -0.5. Fucking Revis injury. Matt Forte just needed 7 points last night. He got 6. Oh I am mad. I can go on and on here, but I'll just stick with way to spoil Matt Ryan, Roddy White, and Victor Cruz assholes. Eli and the 49ers D led kfeyzi to the win.
Aaronetc's Flood the Zone just exploded again with 20+ performances from 6(!) players including Arodg leading to a heartbreaking loss for Rendezvou's Mustached Americans despite putting up 151.5 points.
BCB 3-
JP Destroyed Brewers Pug, who didn't start a second wide receiver, though it didn't matter much. JP was led by the Brady-Welker connection as well as Dewayne Bowe. Eli and Ridley were the only bright spots for the pug.
Noah's Somebody that I used to So'oto went all sorts of ape shit with Peyton, Witten, and the 49ers combining for 101 together on Jarlbartar's team, who had a good week but couldn't keep pace. Jarl was led by Lynch and Brandon Marshall.
tcyoung (got it that time) was hindered by single digit performances by Jennings, Run DMC, and Stevie Johnson and fell short of Yar's Man Getting Hit By Football. Yar was solid all around, being led by Roddy and Vjax.
A bullshit late game Cowboy TD knocked my Van Stains out of the lead for good as the Bears D couldn't overcome shit performances from Dennis Pitta and Rod Bironas. Brew Guy Tim solidified his win with Dez's bullshit 2 pointer at the end of the game as well. So much hate in my heart right now. I will get it out in a little bit.
Zorakathura's 4 guys in single digits were enough to beat Meiz, who had 5 guys in single digits.
Team of the week: Flood the Zone had a ridiculous week with 197 points. Rodgers, Lynch, McGahee, Marshall, Jordy and the Texans D were all over 20 points for him. Congrats aaronetc on your 2nd TotW title this year. It should also be noted that he had the lowest score of any team last week, and came back with a vengeance.
Noah's Somebody that I used to So'oto also went off scoring 196 points. He had those three guys mentioned above, but also got 16+ points from Torrey Smith, AP, and D Thomas. Only Mason Crosby scored in single digits for him.
The Yar Nivek Lucky Bastard Award- BrewGuyTim wins this week on a bullshit late game cowboys touchdown and 2 point conversion that knocked the Bears D down in Points Allowed and Dez got his 2 points... God, so frustrating. Anyway, congrats ass.
The Hard Luck Loser award- Olyknows scored the 8th highest total this week, and lost. Man Sploosh and Jeo's Unemployed Honey Badgers lost by 0.5 points. Tough break
Before I get to power ranks, I need to spew some hate. Matt Forte, you just needed one more catch or 8 more yards, and you couldn't get either, not that Mason Crosby, the fucking Jets D, Kyle Rudolph or Percy harvin helped. God I have you guys. Go fellate a parakeet. And the Bears D... You let the cowboys march down the field and steal a win from me. God I hate you so. I also hate fucking Dennis Pitta who put up fucking nothing for two of my teams. I hope some make a wish kid gets his cancer all over you. Dick.
Power Rankings:
We have a new #1!!! Fiesta took over the top spot as Leam had a rough week scoring the 4th fewest points. Also of note, 5 of the top 6 teams are in league 1. That's just impressive. Feel free to spew your hate in the comments.
Rank | BCB Name | Team Name | League | Wk 4 Pts | Wk 4 Pow | Wins | Total Pts | Total Pow |
1 | Fiesta | Stomp The Yard ft. N. Suh | 1 | 173 | 28 | 2 | 578 | 84.5 |
2 | Masondlo | Blackmon's Apologetic Cocktail | 1 | 171 | 27 | 3 | 564 | 84 |
3 | Mr Leam | Cam, I Wish I was your lover | 1 | 105.5 | 4 | 2 | 555.5 | 81 |
4 | CheezeConQueso | Finley Shades of Gray | 1 | 123.5 | 10 | 4 | 538 | 78.5 |
5 | Golfallday | Lil Sebastian Janikowski | 2 | 159.5 | 24 | 3 | 558 | 78 |
6 | Hyatt | Sanchez's Lil Black Yearbook | 1 | 145.5 | 18 | 3 | 555 | 77 |
7 | Zorakathura | Burn in Harrell | 3 | 137 | 15 | 3 | 557 | 76 |
8 | aaronetc | Flood the Zone w/ Cheryl Tunt | 2 | 197 | 30 | 2 | 567 | 75 |
9 | BrewGuyTim | Spiking Montee's Ball | 3 | 118 | 7.5 | 3 | 536 | 73.5 |
10 | Hyatt | Man-Sploosh | 2 | 127.5 | 11 | 2 | 530.5 | 73.5 |
11 | Yar Nivek | Man Gets Hit By Football | 3 | 154.5 | 22 | 4 | 559.5 | 70 |
12 | rendezvous | Mustached Americans | 2 | 151.5 | 20 | 2 | 532.5 | 69 |
13 | texwestern | JoPas Blind Eye | 2 | 152 | 21 | 3 | 522 | 69 |
14 | ObiBraunKenobi | Raiders of the lost Glory Hole | 2 | 160 | 25 | 1 | 518 | 69 |
15 | jarlbartar | Soapin Up with Jerry's Kids | 3 | 140.5 | 16.5 | 1 | 522 | 67.5 |
16 | kfeyzi | Ochocinco's Casting Tape | 2 | 128 | 12 | 3 | 520.5 | 64 |
17 | JP | The Duke Silver Experience | 3 | 160.5 | 26 | 2 | 509 | 61 |
18 | Dikembe Meiz | Ocho Benoit | 3 | 110 | 5 | 2 | 494 | 59 |
19 | brewerspug | Working To Shiva's Bush | 3 | 93.5 | 1 | 1 | 488.5 | 59 |
20 | brewcrewbrian | Jerry Sandusky's Little Giants | 1 | 140.5 | 16.5 | 2 | 516 | 55.5 |
21 | Olyknows | Saints $10k Sack Attack | 1 | 156.5 | 23 | 2 | 494 | 55.5 |
22 | Noah Jarosh | Somebody that I used to So'oto | 3 | 196 | 29 | 1 | 503.5 | 47 |
23 | Icecreamman | Ice Cold Bruschis | 1 | 149 | 19 | 2 | 476 | 46.5 |
24 | tcyoung | Rusty Zombone | 3 | 130 | 14 | 1 | 460 | 46 |
25 | jerryheldred | 50 Shades of Heyword-Bey | 2 | 118 | 7.5 | 1 | 472.5 | 44.5 |
26 | JEO | Unemployed Honey Badgers | 1 | 123 | 9 | 0 | 452.5 | 44 |
27 | Hyatt | Unidentified Rob Ryan Van | 3 | 111.5 | 6 | 2 | 472 | 43.5 |
28 | arfuture1985 | Hey That's My Dick Jauron | 2 | 95 | 2 | 2 | 443 | 39 |
29 | DoubleB440 | Supreme Leader Kim John | 2 | 96.5 | 3 | 1 | 446 | 36 |
30 | tepo6688 | Jintao Athletic Labor Camp | 1 | 128.5 | 13 | 0 | 439.5 | 34 |