FanPost

Brewers lose back-to-back contests. Sky fall iminent.

Status of communication to government leaders in limbo pending further investigation.

By GoldenFrank, Beat Writer, Night Owl, Irrelevant Meme Regurgitator.

WISCONSIN

In a series of events that has literally never happened before, the National League Central leading Milwaukee Brewers lost consecutive contests June 24th and 25th. As if Monday's 3-0 slaughtering at the hands of 2012 3rd place Cy Young vote-winner Gio Gonzalez and the Nationals wasn't embarrassing enough, the Brew Crew went out and was absolutely humiliated in 16 innings by 2013 All-Star and Cy Young candidate Jordan Zimmermann, along with the Nationals' NL leading bullpen. The back-to-back losses threaten to shatter an already fragile BCB psyche.

When asked for comments, Brewers personnel seemed non-plussed. Manager Ron Roenicke had little to say: "BCB? What's that. Is that that Spanish talk I hear the boys use in the clubhouse after my presentations on the contact play? Beisbol Con Bunting? We just call that baseball where I come from fella."

2011 NL MVP Ryan Braun, who drove in a measly 2 runs in Tuesdays's contest had "no comment" directing all questions to his secretary. Unfortunately, Mr. Weeks had already left the clubhouse.

Bench Coach Jerry Narron had originally agreed to an interview, but was unavailable due to a calligraphy related injury in the 12th inning of Tuesday's marathon contest. Narron appeared to be injured when making yet another change to his already heavily altered line-up card. He is listed as day-to-day with a "dead wrist".

It's going to be a tough road from here on out at BCB. This is the worst thing that's happened to the Brewers in like, forever. Suicide hotlines have been alerted to expect an influx of calls should the Brewers do the unthinkable and lose a third game tomorrow to wunderkind Stephen Strasburg. Businesses in the financial district have already been seen beefing up security against potential looters. Alternatively, should this team full of horrible baseball players do the unthinkable and actually win a game, the World Series parade planning committee (which immediately cancelled tomorrow's meeting following the extra innings loss) will reconvene next Wednesday afternoon as scheduled.

X
Log In Sign Up

forgot?
Log In Sign Up

Forgot password?

We'll email you a reset link.

If you signed up using a 3rd party account like Facebook or Twitter, please login with it instead.

Forgot password?

Try another email?

Almost done,

By becoming a registered user, you are also agreeing to our Terms and confirming that you have read our Privacy Policy.

Join Brew Crew Ball

You must be a member of Brew Crew Ball to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Brew Crew Ball. You should read them.

Join Brew Crew Ball

You must be a member of Brew Crew Ball to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Brew Crew Ball. You should read them.

Spinner.vc97ec6e

Authenticating

Great!

Choose an available username to complete sign up.

In order to provide our users with a better overall experience, we ask for more information from Facebook when using it to login so that we can learn more about our audience and provide you with the best possible experience. We do not store specific user data and the sharing of it is not required to login with Facebook.

tracking_pixel_9351_tracker