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Brewers 2, Cardinals 7: Hey St. Louis, the jerk store called

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They're running out of you.

David Banks

Win: Lance Lynn (14-10)
Loss: Yovani Gallardo (11-10)

HR: Adams (16)

MVP: Yovani Gallardo (.145 WPA)
LVP: Rob Wooten (-.227 WPA)

Fangraphs win expectancy graph
Boxscore

What a snoozefest after the first inning! No, really, I fell asleep for a while. Good news is, I didn't miss much.

The first three runs of the game all scored in the first inning. Matt Holliday hit a two-out single in the top half of the frame before Matt Adams launched a two-run homer off Yovani Gallardo. The Brewers scored their first run in the bottom of the first. Scooter Gennett hit a one-out double to start off the Brewers bats. That was followed by a single and a walk to load the bases. Finally, Khris Davis hit the sexiest RBI groundout you'll ever see. Jeff Bianchi struck out to end the inning with runners on second and third.

After that, both Gallardo and Lance Lynn were pretty spectacular. Gallardo allowed just two more hits and a walk following the first, pitching seven innings in all. Lynn made it 6.1 innings, with four hits and four walks against him total.

Still, no more runs scoring for a long spell meant the Brewers still had a chance. You know, until the eighth inning. It's not a true bullpen'd, but, ehh, close enough. Rob Wooten gave up a bunch of hits and wound up with five earned runs against him. The last two scored after Alredo Figaro came in to finish the inning.

Khris Davis drove in another run with a ground-rule double in the bottom of the eighth, but a 7-1 lead is pretty difficult for the worst-scoring Brewers offense in recent memory to overcome. A 7-2 lead is only marginally better. As it turns out, the Brewers had nothing left in the tank for the ninth and are helping hand the division to St. Louis. Ugh.

The good news is that, after tomorrow, we can be assured the Brewers won't lose to the Cardinals again for another six months or so.